Spending more time than money, makes you think and act in different ways. Cracking open a good puzzle, with a devil may care attitude, feels like a good way to celebrate. Sometimes though, your biggest blocker in life, is yourself!
A little while ago, I had treated myself to a new puzzle. A grown up, 1000 piece puzzle. I know, I hear you...I have totally moved up to the big leagues. I am more used to a 25 piece chunky, or the odd 50 piece glittery floor puzzle if I am feeling daring, so a 1000 is a super stretch goal and I am feeling like a big girl.
Earlier in the year, Mum bought me a puzzle board. I think the idea being I could sit and make my puzzle at night, with a glass of wine, and have some chill out time. This is needed around Day 22, as the littlest dot is poorly. She has a tummy bug, and we are all taking time to go slowly, watch movies and rest!
I am all for mindful activities, in fact I seek them out, as I have anxiety issues. This feels hard, and I cannot help but wonder, do I subconsciously seek out stressful activities on purpose??
I wear glasses, and just starting to have to wear varifocals. As in low-light, and with things close up I cannot see, and pull muscles in my arms moving the thing backwards and forwards, whilst pulling a face like a displeased Robert De Niro! So I am struggling anyway. When I start unboxing the puzzle, I realise quite quickly, I am fucked!! The pieces are tiny. Not only that, due to the picture of my puzzle, all the tiny pieces have slightly different variations of purple.
Just as an important point to note, I haven’t received the new glasses as yet, due to events beyond my control. My current glasses, are held together with washi tape and hot glue. I sat on them during the first week of lock down, and had to do a super-crafting repair job. Apparently they look ugly, but to me they are beautiful, still allow me to see, and the hot glue and washi tape has held them into place for so many days and weeks!! Go, go super-crafter hands.
Anyway, I am in love with the puzzle, but feel there are blockers to my experience. I strongly suspect I am standing in my own way here. It all feels kind of overwhelming. Which I know is silly, as it is supposed to feel mindful and slow. I cannot work out how to balance a massive board on my lap, see the small puzzle pieces in low light, drink wine and watch tele, all at the same time.
Suddenly, I realise, I am trying to do so many things at the same time. I am never going to be successful.
This is the moment, I get a total grip on myself! Unsure why I am complicating this so much, I move the board to the dining room table, turn on the big light, and get comfy. Well, the progress is amazing. With the right tools, AND with the right mindset you can totes achieve anything, babes. I whip through the puzzle, within a couple of days, and stand back to look at my achievement!!
The little dot, comes over and appraises my work. Admiring the purple, and looking at the main character - as the puzzle theme is Disney Villains, it picture is Ursula from 'The Little Mermaid'. Littles stand there for a bit and looks up at me, she says: "Mum, your boobs look a bit like Ursula's!" Then she looks me up and down and follows up with: "...and your butt!!" Not all the work you do in life is appreciated, I guess. That's OK with me, and my beautiful butt.
I ponder on this feedback for a bit, and then decide she must be better. Where there is sass, there is life!